Why did Robert Palmer have to die? WHY?
Wouldn't have it been slightly more entertaning for him to come in from stage left during tonight's State of the Union, backed by Condi, Dick and Rumsfeld dressed like vamps, sporting red electric guitars and singing "we're gonna have to face it we're Addicted to Oil."
If he was going to use the addiction theme, he should have started with Lost, American Idol, iPods, McDonalds, the Brangelina scandal ... at least something EVERYONE is addicted to. Something tells me the "addiction to oil" rally call coming from Big Tex of all people didn't resonate so well with the guy from Oregon who drives a Toyota Prius and hates W's guts to begin with. Who you callin' an addict, bi-atch?
My other fave highlight of the evening was Rex, the injured bomb-sniffing dog that W decided needed a Congressional release from his "military contract" (Be All You Can Be, Fido) so that Rex could live full-time with his partner, an Air Force veteran who was injured alongside Rex in Iraq. As much as I feel for an injured soldier and her animal, I must state that I'm so glad that we're prioritizing the Congressional voting schedule these days.
Next hot button item for Capitol Hill? The official establishment of OAA -- Oil Addicts Anonymous.
Chris, an OAA member: "Hi everyone. My name is Chris."
OAA group: "Hi, Chris."
Chris: "I've been driving a Lincoln Navigator for 8 years now. Every time my lease is up, I ... well, I ... I ... this is so hard to talk about ...
OAA group: "Let it out, Chris. Let it out."
Chris: "I ... I RENEW my lease. Oil is my Kryptonite, man. I just can't say no to a 19-gallon tank. Ohhhhh, God, I feel so ... so .... so weak."
OAA group: "Chris, today is the first step in acknowledging your addiction to oil. Good work. Eleven more steps and we'll have you on the road to recovery -- and on a new 10-speed courtesy of OAA's corporate sponsor, Schwinn."
Wouldn't have it been slightly more entertaning for him to come in from stage left during tonight's State of the Union, backed by Condi, Dick and Rumsfeld dressed like vamps, sporting red electric guitars and singing "we're gonna have to face it we're Addicted to Oil."
If he was going to use the addiction theme, he should have started with Lost, American Idol, iPods, McDonalds, the Brangelina scandal ... at least something EVERYONE is addicted to. Something tells me the "addiction to oil" rally call coming from Big Tex of all people didn't resonate so well with the guy from Oregon who drives a Toyota Prius and hates W's guts to begin with. Who you callin' an addict, bi-atch?
My other fave highlight of the evening was Rex, the injured bomb-sniffing dog that W decided needed a Congressional release from his "military contract" (Be All You Can Be, Fido) so that Rex could live full-time with his partner, an Air Force veteran who was injured alongside Rex in Iraq. As much as I feel for an injured soldier and her animal, I must state that I'm so glad that we're prioritizing the Congressional voting schedule these days.
Next hot button item for Capitol Hill? The official establishment of OAA -- Oil Addicts Anonymous.
Chris, an OAA member: "Hi everyone. My name is Chris."
OAA group: "Hi, Chris."
Chris: "I've been driving a Lincoln Navigator for 8 years now. Every time my lease is up, I ... well, I ... I ... this is so hard to talk about ...
OAA group: "Let it out, Chris. Let it out."
Chris: "I ... I RENEW my lease. Oil is my Kryptonite, man. I just can't say no to a 19-gallon tank. Ohhhhh, God, I feel so ... so .... so weak."
OAA group: "Chris, today is the first step in acknowledging your addiction to oil. Good work. Eleven more steps and we'll have you on the road to recovery -- and on a new 10-speed courtesy of OAA's corporate sponsor, Schwinn."
